Why Do Only Fat Guys Dress Up As Batman?

by Peter Jurewicz

The two biggest conventions of the year for US geeks have now passed and I have sadly been unable to attend either so far. That means the season of women dressed as their favorite scantily clad, bad ass chicas has passed and in some cases mercifully so. With each year that passes and my exposure to more of my fellow geeks rises, you begin to take notice of certain things when it comes to the Cons and those that attend them. Only fat guys dress up as Batman and I don’t know why that is.

Certain characters from the comic book and sci-fi genres are always sure to be represented at conventions and most of the time exquisite detail and craftsmanship is put into their costumes. Usually the person who shows up in a completely store bought costume is the point of jokes and ridicule across the Con. Let’s face it, any ordinary shmuck can go out and spend upwards of seventy bucks to make himself look like, but the hardcore fans will not settle for such shotty workmanship! So in a world, where we take our love of these characters to such extremes, why do we still ignore the simple fact that no matter how realistic you’re batsuit is Bruce Wayne would never go out looking like he spent his first semester in college hitting keggers every night?

When it comes right down to it, not every fan has the physique to show off and that is absolutely fine. I myself am anything but the pillar of perfection. But why is it the Bat-fans that always seem to commit such a heinous crime? Every time I see a guy dressed as Superman he’s either incredibly fit or the scrawniest guy ever and usually the scrawny guys are dressed in Clark Kent attire. Guys aren’t alone either, I’ve seen a lot of girls out there who should dress as their favorite anime, comic book, or sci-fi character who we all may appreciate a little better judgment from. Sometimes it looks like the Poison Ivy spent more time scarfing donuts then she did cultivating her plants during her most recent stint in Arkham Asylum.

Now I know this may have came off mean and rude, but honestly I’m just trying to understand the logic. If you put in the time to make the most badass Batman suit that doesn’t require a feature film budget, why not put in some of the time and effort to get yourself in Bruce Wayne shape? Let’s face it. Some of us geeks, myself included, could use it!

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